I Am Not Enough by Dr. Naima Johnston Bush (c) 2019
I am not enough
When she brings
Grimy little fists
To eyes brimming
with tears
Angry, sad, or out of sorts
Because of the injustices
Thrust upon her
Little voice shaking
And heart needing stitching
She calls out for me
But she really doesn’t mean me
Or does she?
I can ply her with kisses
Sing gentle songs
Of His power and His grace
Purchase princess dresses
Play tea party
Take her to the House of Mouse
Spend hours interceding for her in prayer
And let her stay up later then she should
But when I take her to the place
Where the other mother resides
It doesn’t matter
That I band aid scrapped knees
And sit up wiping brows
When she is feverish and dull
When the mother of the body
Descends with her presence
I am cast aside
Although I offer the world
And the wisdom of the Word
And she offers grief and inconsistency
I am the one who straps her in once again
Broken after two hours of paradise
Screaming and shooting bitterness into my open arms
I am affirmed once again
That I will never be enough
Dr. Naima Johnston Bush
Foster Mother © 2019 7thirtyseven Logos Publishing